Insta-gratify yourself?

Back in my blogger shoes in the new year!
With demonetization shaking the ground and great music souls RIP'ing, 2016 ended on a bittersweet note.

While stepping into 2017 with new perspective and expectations, as usual, started pondering over our motivations and fuel for every day.

Disclaimer: My introspective self is always ready with multi-dimensional questions (in CS/DS terms - don't bother if you don't know those abbrevations - like a n-ary tree which goes many levels deep).

What is your fuel?
Conversations with friends and family? Stuff you do passionately every day? Impact you are making in the lives of people around? Experience you acquire while doing all this...?

One thing that seems to ego-massage my inner-self everyday is marked in "red". Irony, isn't it?

Before you start hitting me with all your perverted guesses, let me tell you I meant notifications on my mobile!
I seem to love those red notification dots flashing on my mobile every now and then. Whatsapp, Viber, FB, Instagram, Quora, Smule, Meetups... everybody seems to be obsessed with red as if you are saying... "Hey... here's a life changing message you got from somebody (whose number I haven't saved - not intentionally, of course) saying 'Good Morning. Have a nice day!' " Ah, I love the feeling when I grab my phone and click on that button which keeps flashing. Even if I lock my phone, that red dot ("My precious" in Gollum's tone) has an assistant (another blinking light at the bottom of my mobile. What an innovation! As if I'm a sailor sailing the distant seas and I see a lighthouse of hope in the form of this lifeline - a bloody blinking blue light )

I'm definitely not complaining! If you think I'm, I better clarify. I love those notifications despite my arduous failed attempts to stay away from them.

I tried

1. Disabling internet at every possible instance
2. Downgrading my data plan
3. Downgrading my wifi plan
4. Uninstalling apps
5. Disabling push notifications
6. Disabling read receipts to curb the urge to see if the person I have sent the msg to checked it or not
7. Repeatedly requesting friends to call and meet me persistently
8. Asking for real help through all those channels 

But I still love those beautiful red dots! 

"Precious, these hobbitses won't let us check those dots! Tiny stinky hairy hobbitseeeees!" 

Money works in many ways

[ Inspired by demonetization initiative in India and also my reading of Economics of Banking. I got to tell you both have been very painful. ;) I want this post to be a sort of cliched one. Am not very good with words and meter. ]

Money works in many ways
 
We save a penny here and a penny there
Our vaults get heavy and our ego too
We lose time to even count your pennies
We drive fancy cars and have great views from the window
Wear the best and look the best
Roam the world with a backpack and stubble

What does money want?

It loves movement from hand to hand.
It cannot contain in a locked safe!
It longs for value.
If you don't give it what it deserves, it goes sad and black!

What is money?
Moulded metal or printed note?
It pervades everywhere. 
It drives people insane.

Money works in many ways.

Money's made of the hope that we LIVE the next day.
However we want to.
Nothing more and nothing less.

Going high

We hear this everyday.

He's hit his high.
This drink gets me high.
You should always aim high.

When do you get high?

• When you score the best in exam and top the list? 
• When your team wins a volleyball match and you see the certificate? 
• Or when you get into the university you have only dreamt about 
• Or when you graduated successfully with a high paying job in a well-known corporate?
• When you play a tal with variation you have only heard but never tried before and see that spark in your teacher's eye?
• Or when your professor overlooks your late course application and approves your course after a tough debate and lecture on punctuality?
• When you give yourself a generous dose of a beverage or let some quirky smoke enter into your breath?
• Or when you hear a tune and bang your head for half-an-hour and realize it's just another well-known ragam? 
• Or when you give flowers and see the girl smiling mysteriously as if nothing had happened? And then have a non-stop-2-min-laugh about it as if how-dare-you-no-way!
• When you stumble upon a friend at a random place and start exchanging life events - present and past? 
• When you know you are right and button up for whatever is ahead?
• When you can't play a tune how-much-ever hard you try but play it flawlessly the very first time next day?
• While watching the movie you know you imagined this much better than what is shown?
• Or when you click a perfect portrait and your subject says thanks with the eyes?
• Or when you can't help but repeatedly thank the chef (and a friend) for making the lunch memorable?
• When you say something without validating internally and realize there's something cool about it? 

River of life

[ Inspired by Cauvery water issue and some personal experiences, of course ]

I'm life!

I don't come with a plan. I don't come with a schedule.
I have a destination but that's not my end.
I die everyday when I meet the ocean. I'm born everyday too.
I flood. I narrow down. I slow down. I flatten. But I never stop! 

There are bridges, which stay aloof.
They keep telling everyone to stay away from me and be safe.
They frown upon my vastness and depth.

There are dams, which try to stop and contain me.
They try to use me in ways - they think - that will help people.

My most valuable possession lies in my heart - the fishes, plants and micro organisms.
They fill themselves with me.
They are there for me wherever I go.
To an extent, may be, I exist for that love.

There are boats that flow with me and share some of my love!

People fight over me. I don't take sides.
I'm for those who need me.
People try to change my course. I oblige as long as I support my love.
I hate wastes from people and industries. They pollute me! They harm me and my love.

I AM life! 

Love,
A River

Grad School (Another short story)

[A story once written is never as beautiful the second time.]

It still feels like a dream. He still has his wife's words ringing in his head, "It's time for her to become a woman." He has never left her all by herself for more than a week. Now he'll have to do it for a semester. He wanted to ask her how long their semesters are. 3 months? What if it's 6 months?

He pulled down at the university hostel. It's a simple building with girl students gossipping. He also spots the warden who spoke to parents during their induction session for newly joining students. His mind is switching between the present and his arguments with his wife.

He: There are 2 top-rated universities in engineering nearby. We can drive there in less than 3 hours. Moreover, what's the scope for a career in literature? A journalist? A writer? A teacher? It looks to me like she wants to run away from home!

His wife (Interrupts): The whole world is not made up of only engineers and scientists. Let the girl follow her interests.  

He: Do you think she has a boy friend?

His wife: Not any that I know of. Honey, she's our daughter. She can face the world. You are just over-thinking. 

He: It's a 10 hour drive from here. I want to be there with her and see all the on-boarding myself. 

His wife: Johnny has his mid-term. I need to be here. 

He realizes he went blank thinking about their conversation. She is still looking at him silently not interrupting his thoughts. Just like him, she is not able to speak.

The dad in him takes over. "You have all the stuff packed. Clothes, books, tab, mobile... ummm... some stuff your mom prepared. Make sure you check if the SIM is active by the evening", he speaks quickly trying to suppress his urge to ask her how long her semester is.

"It won't be too long, pa! I'm going to be home before christmas.", she replies as if she heard him.  He supresses his reaction. She continues, "Home's been my world. I want to see more. I will meet students from across the world. Learn. Make friends. Learn from professors. I looked up so much about this university and their curriculum in this area. I made more than 10 calls over phone and skype to my seniors from school".

"But, baby, you have never been out of home for more than a week." He regrets why he said that. She is in tears. He hugs her. She doesn't let go. He pats her on the back of her head.

After a pause, she starts "Honestly, pa, I don't think I can last a day here. More than anything else, I don't know how I can spend a day not fighting with Johnny. I'll skype you every day at 7 PM. Remind Johnny to pick another slot for basket ball. I looked up trains which come over to our place. May do a couple of trips home over the weekends before christmas. I know mom didn't want to come here because she doesn't want to show that she misses me." 
 

He takes a pen from his pocket and gives her. "This thing, honey. This little thing here is very powerful. This made regimes fall. This liberated many lives. This has pushed the limits of thinking, imagination, creativity and reality. Let this be the light for your future." He couldn't believe he just said some deep stuff. He guesses it's part of being a dad. 

She doesn't let him go still. He wriggles out and kisses her on the forehead. With a heavy heart, he steps back into the car. The warden comes swiftly and holds her hand.  She assures him that this young lady is going to be a strong woman. He drives a 100 yards and stops to see his girl walk into the hostel glancing backwards mirroring the heaviness in his heart. 

He never thought about how he'll feel not seeing her at dinner everyday. Johnny and his wife seem to have already prepared themselves for it.

A Short Story

He senses her moving sharply behind him. She's not speaking a word but he knows she's furious. She calls his friend, Vijay, who was sitting in the other room on a couch comfortably, with amplified artificial sweetness in her voice "Vijay, let's go out for dinner today. I didn't cook anything". Vijay, to his utter dismay, is grinning widely. She signals Vijay to come and help her with folding her clothes. While Vijay is still at his job, he goes to her and asks if she's fine. She feigns another artificially sweetened smile saying everything and everybody is absolutely fine.

He knows he's made a mistake. May be he shouldn't have told what's on his mind. He is not clear if she is angry about what he told or how he told. He wished girls (especially this girl) were more patient and explain what's on their mind. He feels as if he has crossed the line but doesn't know how!

He walks slowly to her while she's combing her hair. She sees him coming in the mirror. She chooses to look at herself. He tries talking to her while framing all the sentences in his mind. He just can't. He clears his throat loud so she could hear him. She simply ignores him as if she didn't hear anything. He brunts out another "Ahem" before he mutters "Sorry. I didn't think it'll make you so angry."

She turns to him immediately at a speed he has never seen her move. Her face is now red. Before he even realizes, a storm is upon him. She is at him, "We have been living in the same place for over an year. Our families know each other. We have atleast a 100 common friends on facebook. We hangout almost every day. Even Vijay knows what's wrong! Sorry for what? Why are things so complicated with you?"

His frown turns into a smile.
She doesn't wait for his reply.
While she walks off angrily with Vijay, he knows it's time for him to get into action. 

L-man & M-woman

(My amateur - supposed to be fun but actually not - super hero story)

Mother Nature (M) can't help but notice the imbalance in the world. Men and women are not attracted to each other anymore! They are distracted all the time with their gadgets - mobiles, tablets, smart watches, TVs - at home. When they are out of their home, they are after power, money and self-gratification. M knows that the world can't go like this far enough. M knows more than clearly that the fundamental source of all forms of positive emotions - friendship, peace, camaraderie, joy and celebration - is love. Only when people are in love, they feel good about themselves and others. That's the only way to restore humanity. She's so sure!

But how is that possible?

M has so many other responsibilities. The environment is polluted, so many species are going extinct, stars are dying, droughts, cyclones, seismic activity, volcanic activity... there are just too many of them. M needs to scale. So she decides to create a new super power, L-man.

L-man can make two organisms fall in love.

1. He can touch any two beings and they will instantly fall in love with each other. Remember, he has to touch both of them only then they fall in love. Just one touch is of no significance. ( I'm taking no questions there. That's how super powers work! )
2. He can be at many places at the same time. M thought this is important because she felt her creations are so many and growing!

The first few centuries L-man got to work, he was quite successful. He made things work like magic! People respond to his touch like crazy. They go sleepless, no hunger, feel insecure, deep think, trash talk, obsess, cry and what not! He also sees that the more they stayed in touch the better they feel. They seem to enjoy each other's company more after his touch. L-man also experiments touching beings of the same gender and that works too! M, however, isn't sure how that'll work for the next generation. She also needs to think about maintainability and sustenance, you see! She thinks it's not coming in the way of what she's doing so it's OK.

One fine day, L-man realizes a flaw in his activity. He is touching same beings multiple times forgetting that he had touched them already. When he spoke about this to M, she starts thinking deeply about it! M feels the need for somebody who can reinforce the power of L-man's touch into the lives of people. M is convinced there has to be an M Jr. She creates M-woman.

M-woman starts working with L-man to bring longevity to his touch.

These are their super-hero logos, OK?